TBS fashion {Semper Stylish}...

This Semper Stylish post is brought to you by the Quantico TBS Marines.  Oorah, 2nd Lts. ;)  

Boy1 stylin' in his wannabe TBS wear. 

Giveaway to bring awareness to "Stop Soldier Suicide"...

Fashion designer and former Marine Antonio Centeno of Real Men Real Style is helping to raise awareness and money for a cause that is near and dear to his heart.  Antonio experienced the loss of two friends to suicide, and recently experienced the loss of his sister in the same way.  He is coping and grieving for his loved ones by using his "business to raise funds for causes which [he] feels are force multipliers for the fight against suicide."  

Antonio created a limited number of silk ties that honor each military branch.  For every tie sold, he will donate $50 to Stop Soldier Suicide, a non-profit organization that exists to curb suicide attempts among US Soldiers and Veterans. 

The ties retail for $79, but buyers can receive a $30 discount by entering the promo code "military" at checkout.  

{GIVEAWAY} In order to continue to raise awareness for Stop Soldier Suicide, Antonio and Real Men Real Style are giving away one tie to a lucky Semper Wifey reader.  All you have to do is visit the website, then come back here and comment which tie is your favorite and who you would give it to.  A winner will be selected at random on October 1.  

Enjoying the now of summer...

Remember my post last week about putting my pumpkin decorations out in the summer?  Well, I took my own advice and spent a morning at the beach.  I still have my pumpkins out at home, and my house still smells, like "leaves," but I rejoiced in the present season by wearing a short dress, taking my shoes off, and wading in the ocean.  (And I might have sipped a pomegranate mimosa.)  Summer at its finest. :)

New affiliate and fundraiser program for the Semper Wifey Shop...

I'm so excited to announce that the Semper Wifey Shop has a new affiliate program!  This is a great (and super easy) way to make money for yourself or for your organization.  Please read the flyer below and email me (semperwifey75(at)gmail.com) to sign up and start making a little moula!

Put away the pumpkins...

I have a confession to make.  All of my pumpkin decorations are out, my house smells like autumn, and I just bought some pumpkin spice coffee.  And if I'm being really honest, my house has looked and smelled like fall since September 1.  OK, August 30.

As I spent most of the day yesterday trying to stay cool in the 95 degree weather, I thought that maybe, just maybe, I was a little crazy for trying to channel fall in the heat of summer.  But don't I do that for every season?  As soon as it's actually fall, I'm planning for winter and Christmas.  By January, I am praying that that silly little groundhog doesn't see his shadow.  Then goodness knows I'm ready for the carefree attitude of summer right after that.

Why do I always look forward to the next season?  What am I missing in my current season while I'm planning for the next?  If I always look ahead, I'll never see what's right around me.

If I'm always looking forward to the end of deployment, I might miss the precious memories I'm making with my sons.  If I'm always looking forward to when Boy2 is more independent, I might miss him sleeping in my arms after his bottle.  If I'm always looking forward to our next move, I might miss the peace that comes with being settled in one place for a while.

Maybe I should put away my pumpkins until the appropriate time (like when it's actually fall) and go enjoy a day at the beach (since it is actually summer)!  

Superhero no more...

We've all seen the military wife propaganda that circulates.  Military wives are fierce.  They are strong.    They are independent.  They can do anything.   They are superheroes.

I'm sure you've also heard the legends of fearless military wives.  The military wife that found out her husband was killed in action and invited his buddies over to watch football that same day because she was worried about them.  The military wife that never complained when her husband unexpectedly deployed the day after their wedding or their first child was born. 

While these trite sayings and quaint stories are enough to make any military wife feel empowered, how far is too far with these facades and legends?  When does the feeling of empowerment by the circulation of these stories and ideals get overshadowed by feelings of inadequacy?  I think it happens very quickly. 

Military wives are a unique bunch of women.  They are called to go above and beyond the call of duty of any civilian wife.  But when we're constantly told, and expected, to be strong all the time, it's not long before our strength will inevitably fail.  I'm proud of myself for dealing with, and most of the time embracing and enjoying, the military lifestyle. But I cry. I get frustrated. I get tired of doing life alone. And I feel guilty because I'm not always living up to the prescribed standard for military wives.

From talking to other military wives about their personal struggles and from reading other military wives' blogs, it seems that the reality of military wives is indeed one of strength.  But it's also one of vulnerability.  The real stories of military wives are that they lock themselves in the bathroom to have a good cry because their toddlers are too much that day and Dad won't be home for months to help ease the burden.  They go to weddings, parties, holidays, and family reunions by themselves because their husbands aren't home.  They sleep with their phones in hopes of getting a phone call from their husbands in the middle of the night.  Or they sleep with their phones so they can check their email several times a night in anticipation of an email from their husbands.  They check all the doors and windows at night, set the alarm, and make sure their car keys are beside their bed in case something happens.  Their emotions are a wreck and will be unleashed on an unsuspecting person.  The slightest mishap can make a military wife throw her hands up in surrender simply because she has to handle another thing alone. 

These are the real stories of military wives.  The legends are just that.  They are not real.  And the legends and cute catch phrases associated with military wives should never be used as a tool against military wives to shame them into behaving a certain way, specifically as an immortal, solely independent, and happy woman who has her act together all the time.  It's just not right to place those unrealistic expectations on anyone.

Military wives: take off your superhero cape and rip it up!  Be real.  Be honest.  You're not strong all the time.  Let other military wives know it's ok to take off their superhero capes, too.  We are hurting ourselves, our families, and those around us that genuinely want to help us when we wear the military wife superhero cape.  Just like other superheroes, military wife superheroes are legends, fairy tales, and folklore.  Superheroes do not exist.

Instead of finding fading strength in "being a military wife," find your strength in the Lord.  "The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song."  -Psalm 28:7